“The Helmsman’s Logs: 2371” [PG-13] – 1/2

timeagain-16

I had recently read J.A. Toner’s marvelous
“Log Entries”, a collection of B’Elanna Torres’ personal logs
from Season 1 to mid-Season 5. For a while, I had hoped she
would write a similar story from Tom Paris’ viewpoint, but, so
far, it has not happened. In the end, I decided to take on
that task myself. This story is a collection of Tom’s logs
during Voyager’s years in the Delta Quadrant.

Also, Season 2 episodes like “Projection”, “Twisted”, “Elogium”
and “The 37s” were originally supposed to air in Season 1,
after “Learning Curve”. Therefore, the incidents featured in
those episodes will be covered in Part One.

“THE HELMSMAN’S LOGS – 2371”
RATING: [PG-13]
SUMMARY: The first in a collection of Tom Paris’ personal logs
during Voyager’s seven years in the Delta Quadrant. Part 1
focuses upon the ship’s first year, 2371.
FEEDBACK: deerush76@yahoo.com. I would appreciate constructive
feedback. Thank you.
DISCLAIMER: Tom Paris and all other characters related to Star
Trek Voyager belong to Paramount, Viacom, Rick Berman, the
Roddenberry family and other Trek producers.

PART I – 2371

STARDATE 48316.7 – I’m back on a Starfleet vessel. I can’t
believe it! If only Dad could see me now. I can imagine how
he would feel. Then again . . . maybe not. I never understood Owen
Paris. Nor has he ever understood me. I have met the person
whom Dad could relate to. And probably did. Captain Kathryn
Janeway of the Federation starship, VOYAGER.

God, I’m regressing. I better start from the beginning. It
all began two days ago. I was serving my eighteen month
sentence at the Federation Penal Settlement in New Zealand –
otherwise known as Club Fed. While repairing a power generator, when a
throaty voice called out my name. I looked up and there stood
this red-haired goddess in a Starfleet uniform. Maybe goddess
isn’t the right word. The good Captain is what one would
describe as diminutive in height. But despite that, she did
have presence.

To make a long story short, Captain Janeway asked me to help
search for a particular Maquis ship that had disappeared in the
Badlands. It seemed her security chief had joined the crew –
as a Starfleet spy. And guess who commanded this particular
crew? My old ‘buddy’, Chakotay. I can imagine that bastard’s
reaction when learns that I helped Starfleet hunt down his
precious ship. Did I say when? That’s right. Despite the
fact that helping Janeway locate her missing officer seemed
like a hopeless task, I decided to accept her offer. And why
not? I certainly have no loyalty toward Chakotay and his
bunch. Hell, they made my life miserable during my few weeks
in the Maquis. And Janeway has offered to add a word or two during
my next parole review. Who could resist that?

So, here I am, aboard VOYAGER. I must say that she seemed like
one hell of a ship. God, I would give my right leg to sit at
the helm. But it would never happen. Caldik Prime and my stint
in the Maquis made sure of that.

Speaking of Caldik Prime, it seems to have followed me here to
Voyager. The ship’s doctor brought it up the moment I
introduced myself to him. He had been the chief medical
officer at the base on Caldik Prime, at the time. The First
Officer didn’t say a word. At least not with Janeway looking
on. But that sneer on his face and his hesitation to shake my
hand said a thousand words.

If it weren’t for Harry, this damn trip would have been a bust.
Ensign Harry Kim. They don’t make Starfleet ensigns greener
than him. I had to save him from a Ferengi barkeep on Deep
Space Nine, bent on cheating him out of a few latinum. A few
years on a Starfleet vessel should rid him of that naivety.
And I’m sure that once Cavit or Dr. Fitzgerald tell him about
the real Tom Paris, he’ll wise up to me. Damn! Harry is one
of the few people on this ship I really like. Just as well.
I won’t be around very long. End personal log.

STARDATE 48324.61 – A lot has happened in the past few days.
Hell, I don’t know where to begin. VOYAGER got flung 70,000
light years into the Delta Quadrant by some entity on an array
station. This little journey cost the ship several key
officers – including Cavit, Fitzgerald, the chief engineer and
the lovely Lieutenant Stadi. What a shame about Stadi. I
rather liked her.

The crew was beamed to the array, disguised as some Midwestern
farm. Some holographic beauty punched me. We also found the
Maquis crew in a state of unconsciousness. And we ended up in
the same position for three days, while the entity poked and
prodded us. Even worse, I had a ‘pleasant’ little reunion
with Chakotay on the Bridge. The poor bastard was surprised to
learn that his Vulcan weapons man turned out to be a Starfleet
spy. And embarrassed when Janeway prevented him from beating
the tar out of me. I would have enjoyed his embarrassment
even further, if it wasn’t for Harry’s disappearance.

It seems that the being on the array had failed to return a
Maquis engineer and poor Harry to their respective ships.
Which has made me worried. About Harry, I mean. He was the
first person I could truly call a friend. Even after Cavit and
Fitzgerald told him about the three people I killed at Caldik
Prime, and how I got cashiered, he still wanted to remain my
friend. What did he say? “I prefer to choose my own
friends.”
What a friend! And now, he’s missing. I only
hope that Captain Janeway can get him back before something
happens to him. End personal log.

STARDATE 48327.97 – It looks as if VOYAGER is stranded in the
Delta Quadrant for good. I don’t mind. Ever since the ship
got lost, life has . . . well, it has turned out for the
better.

I don’t have to return to prison. We found Harry, along with
the Maquis engineer, on some planet a few light years away from
the array. I saved Chakotay’s butt in the Ocampan tunnels and
earned myself a bodyguard. I’ll need one now that the Maquis
has joined the crew, after Chakotay destroyed their ship during
a battle with a warlike race called the Kazon. The crew has
also acquired a couple of hitchhikers – a funny-looking joker
named Neelix. He’s a Talaxian. Our other hitchhiker is an
Ocampan woman named Kes, whom we had saved from the Kazon.
She’s very beautiful.

Best of all, Captain Janeway has given me a field commission,
the rank of lieutenant junior grade . . . along with the Conn Division.
Which means that I am now VOYAGER’s chief pilot. Isn’t life
grand? I only hope that I can make up to Janeway for all she
has done for me. End personal log.

STARDATE 48339.17 – Life aboard VOYAGER isn’t bad. Well . . .
not that bad. I have to keep an eye out for the Maquis
crewmen. Just in case they decide to use me as a punching bag
for helping Janeway track them to the Badlands. I suspect that
a good number of the Starfleeters might want to do the same.

There is the Conn Division. On one hand, being head of the
division entitles me the position of chief pilot. So far, none
of them have been openly hostile – except for Henley, the lone
Maquis. And yet, they seemed reluctant to seriously pay
attention to the training I have devised for the division.
I’m trying to be thrilled about my new position as VOYAGER’s
chief helmsman, but it’s damn difficult to command a group of
people who consider me a criminal that deserves to spend the
next 70 years in the brig. How do you lead people like that?

It finally came to a head when I tried to give them a pep talk
about learning new piloting maneuvers. “We’re Starfleet
pilots,” Jon Hamilton had said. “Which means that we were
trained at the Academy, just like you. At least none of us had
killed anyone in a shuttle crash. And later lied about it.

For that remark, I assigned Hamilton to the Beta shift for the
next two weeks. Hey, I never claimed to be a saint. Vindictive,
yes, but not a saint. After my little disciplinary action
with Hamilton, the other pilots have ceased questioning my
piloting skills.

Chakotay certainly doesn’t make life easy. Now that he is
VOYAGER’s First Officer, he seems more interested in acting as
my tormentor, instead of bodyguard. If I’m two or three
minutes late on the Bridge, he doesn’t hesitate to point it out
in front of everyone. Even worse, I’ve been summoned to his office on several occasions regarding tardiness and Starfleet
procedures. Mind you, all of this is coming from a man who once
dropped out of Starfleet to join a terrorist group.

At least I have Harry’s friendship. I just don’t know how long that will last. Especially, since he has become friends with that
half-Klingon he was trapped on the Ocampan homeworld with. Her
name is B’Elanna Torres and she works in Engineering. I never
met her during my stint in the Maquis. I had only been with
Chakotay’s cell for a few weeks before my capture, and she was
on a top-secret mission at the time. I must admit that I find
her very beautiful, although somewhat temperamental. She has
made it clear that like her fellow Maquis, she dislikes me.
Not that I care. I’m not exactly fond of her. I don’t mind
her bad temper, but I find her self-righteousness a little hard
to take. A taint she had obviously picked up from Chakotay,
while they were both in the Maquis. I only hope that she
doesn’t come between Harry and me. End personal log.

STARDATE 48443.01 – Nothing much happened recently. VOYAGER
got trapped into an event horizon. Which brought on the sticky
subject of temporal mechanics. God, I hate dealing with that!
It was one of my worst subjects in the Academy. One good
thing came out of it. The pilots under me wanted to know how I
flew VOYAGER out of that horizon. Even Hamilton. To be
honest, I did nothing spectacular. Especially since Janeway
ordered me to use the ship like a battering ram for our escape.

The event horizon brought about another change. Joe Carey is
no longer VOYAGER’s Chief Engineer. B’Elanna Torres, Harry’s
half-Klingon friend, has become the new chief. Despite
breaking Carey’s nose in three different places. If that’s how
one can become chief engineer, how does one become the first
officer? Or the captain? Chakotay must be thrilled that his
little protégée has joined the senior staff.

One last little tidbit that hasn’t exactly made my day.
Because of a course in biochemistry I took at Starfeet, I am
now the new medical assistant and have to work with that
holographic egomaniac in Sick Bay. Sometimes I think the gods
must hate me. End personal log.

STARDATE 48533.7 – Gods, it’s been one hell of a day! VOYAGER
came across a new race called the Vidiians, while searching for
a supply of dilithium.

These Vidiians are a race, who have been inflicted by some
deadly virus called the phage, for the past millinium or two.
To keep their race alive, the Vidiians have engaged in
stealing organs from other humanoids. Ugh! While on an Away
mission with Harry and Chakotay, Neelix had his lungs stolen by
two Vidiians.

If one ever thought that doctors made lousy patients, try
dealing with an annoying Talaxian. I would have removed those
holographic lungs the Doc had created for Neelix, just for a
little peace and quiet, if it weren’t for Kes. She seemed very
concerned about Neelix and I had to assure her that he would
make it through this crisis. I just don’t get it! What does
Kes see in a guy like Neelix, anyway? Gratitude for saving her
from the Kazon? Fortunately, VOYAGER managed to capture the
two Vidiians and one of them turned out to be a physician. He
found a way to alter a donated lung to match Neelix’s
physiology. Guess who turned out to be the donator? That’s
right, Kes. Sigh!

Speaking of doctors, our own chief medical officer is turning
out to be a real pain in the ass. I could understand the
little lecture about holographic matter and so forth. But did
the bastard have to slap my face to prove his point? If you
ask me, the man is a sadist. Maybe I can find a way to change
his personality subroutines. I’ve always been pretty good at
holoprogramming. There is one thing to be thankful. Kes has
just become the new medical assistant. Which means I won’t
have to hang around Sickbay – unless necessary.

Oh, I forgot. Neelix has converted the Captain’s private
dining room into the galley. And now, VOYAGER has a genuine
mess hall. Now that we have a cook, the crew can save
replicator energy. I don’t know about the rest of them, but I
think I’ll stick with replicated food. End personal log.

STARDATE 48549.92 – How can I put this in a nutshell? VOYAGER
explored a nebula, still searching for a supply of dilithium.
The nebula turned out to be a living organism that we damaged
during our little exploration trip. With a little fancy flying
from me, along with the Doctor and Torres’ expertise, we
managed to repair the damage to the nebu . . . uh, the life
form. Of course, all of this resulted in VOYAGER being
drained another 20% of energy.

Anything else? Oh yes. Neelix decided to entertain the Bridge
crew with a few selections of Talaxian hors d’erves. Which I
declined – naturally. I also discovered that Harry remembers
being inside his mother’s womb. What a shame there isn’t a
ship’s counselor on board. I think Harry could really use
one.

I also introduced Harry to my new holoprogram – a recreation of
one of my favorite spots in the universe, Sandrine’s. It’s a
tavern I used to frequent, when I spent my second year in the
Academy at a Starfleet base in Marsailles, France. This
prompted Harry to remark that I miss Earth. Hell, if Earth
only consisted of Sandrine’s, I would. By the way, I believe
that Sandrine, herself, has developed a little interest in my
good buddy.

After our encounter with the nebula/life form, the rest of the
crew decided to try out my program. Including the Captain, who
turned out to be quite the pool hustler. If only Starfleet
knew. The only person who seems to dislike Sandrine’s was
Lieutenant Torres. One of my characters, Gaunt Gary, tried to
proposition her. She, in turn, called us both pigs. You know,
I’m beginning to suspect that Torres really lacks a sense of
humor. If the Captain could tolerate a few innuendos with good
grace, why couldn’t she? End personal log.

STARDATE 48558.22 – Ran into Kes in the Mess Hall, this
evening. Since Neelix was busy preparing dinner for the crew,
I decided to offer her a little company. I learned a lot about
Kes. About her parents, her childhood on the Ocampan
homeworld, and her captivity by the Kazons. We spent so much
time talking about her that we barely touched on my background.
Which suited me just fine. Besides, with a certain Talaxian
cook giving us the evil eye every now and then, we decided to
end our little conversation. What the hell is wrong with
Neelix, anyway? Did he honestly think I would steal Kes from
him? Or ravage her? Hell, the worst anyone could accuse me of
is introducing Kes to my favorite drink – spinach juice, with a
touch of pear. End personal log.

STARDATE 48579.93 – We came so close to returning to the Alpha
Quadrant. Too close, if you ask me. Thank goodness for bad
luck.

Harry had discovered a wormhole that might lead back home.
Although I joked about the Federation (science institute)
naming the wormhole after him, inside I was filled with dread.
Home? Who wanted to go there? As far as I’m concerned,
VOYAGER is home. In the end, we discovered that the wormhole
was too small for the ship to travel through. The Captain
ordered Lieutenant Tuvok to launch a probe through the
wormhole, anyway. I suspect that she had hoped to make contact
with Starfleet. The probe got stuck in some eddy, thanks to
some phase variance. But we managed to eventually make
contact with a Romulan. Fortunately, this Romulan refused to
talk and cut off communication. But that didn’t deter my good
buddy, Harry. While the rest of us slept, he decided to
continue attempts to re-establish contact with the Romulan.
Exactly what does he hope to accomplish? End personal log.

STARDATE 48582.31 – The wormhole turned out to be a bust and
boy, I am relieved! Hell, a return to the Alpha Quadrant would
mean only one thing for me – a reunion with my fellow convicts
at the Federation Penal Settlement in New Zealand. And that’s
a fate I would like to avoid, thank you very much.

For a while, it seemed that the Alpha Quadrant awaited us. Not
only did Captain Janeway managed to re-establish contact with
the Romulan, Torres found a way to transport both objects and
people through the wormhole. Our Romulan contact, a scientist
on a top secret science vessel, became the first humanoid to be
transported through a wormhole, from one quadrant to another.

Then fortune finally stepped in when Tuvok discovered that the
phase variance caused us so much trouble, because the wormhole
not only lead to the Alpha Quadrant, but also twenty years in
the past. Also, our Romulan visitor will not live long enough
to send our messages to the Federation. I realize that the
others are upset, but as far as I’m concerned – all’s well that
ends well. End personal log.

STARDATE 48588.21 – It’s been difficult containing my glee over
our failed attempt with the wormhole. I must be the only
person aboard VOYAGER – aside from Neelix and Kes – who isn’t
disappointed. Although I suspect that our Delta Quadrant
natives are disappointed on behalf of the crew..

Harry has been in a funk, over the past two days. I tried to
cheer him up with a trip to Sandrine’s. Instead, he accused me
of being glad over the whole debacle. How could I deny the
truth? Right now, he’s in Torres’ quarters and both are
probably weeping together over lost opportunities. Do
Klingons weep? I have to look that up.

I can understand why Harry, the Captain and other ‘Fleeters are
upset. But why are the Maquis? Don’t they realize that a
return to the Alpha Quadrant meant a few years in prison for
them? They sure as hell can’t return to fighting Cardassians.
After all, they’re now officially Starfleet prisoners.

At the moment, Kes is the only person I can talk to. While
helping her in the Hydropondics Bay, I explained my feelings
about the wormhole to her. She seemed to understand. What a
relief to find someone I can be honest with.
End personal log.

STARDATE 48604.37 – How could I have been so stupid? What the
hell was I thinking?

Once again, I’ve gone ahead of myself. This is what happened.
VOYAGER encountered a race called the Baneans. They offered
to help repair VOYAGER’s busted collimator. The Captain ordered Harry
to the Banean homeworld, to confer with their top scientist on
the repairs. And since they were at war with another race
called the Numeri, guess who had to fly Harry to Banea? That’s
right! Me.

If only Captain Janeway had sent another pilot. If only
Doctor Ren had been married to an older and less attractive
woman. Hell! If only I had listened to Harry and Liddell, I
would not be in this mess! Liddell Ren. The moment I laid
eyes upon her, I fell in deep lust. Very beautiful and
obviously very bored with her marriage. And since I was bored
listening to Harry and the Doctor discuss engineering, I
decided to focus my attention on the gorgeous mistress of the
house.

Poor Doctor Ren ended up murdered – stabbed in the heart. The
Baneans accused me of the deed, claiming that the good doctor’s
memory engrams clearly showed that I was guilty. Only, I don’t
remember stabbing the man. Nor do I remember kissing Liddell
in the Arterium. Unfortunately, the Baneans didn’t believe
me, thanks to those memory engrams. And now, they have
convicted me of murder and punished me by grafting Doctor Ren’s
engrams with my own. Every fourteen hours, I have to relive
the memory of the murder through his eyes. Something is not
right. The murder couldn’t have happened like this!
Fortunately, the Captain and Tuvok arrived on Banea to
investigate and return me to VOYAGER. I only hope they can get
me out of this mess. End personal log.

STARDATE 48607.42 – Thank goodness for Tuvok! If it weren’t
for him, I would have spent the rest of my life, reliving false
memories of Doctor Ren’s murder, every 14 hours. Considering
how those engrams were frying my neural pathways, I would not
have lived very long.

Tuvok discovered that I was being used as a courier between the
Numeri, and a Banean doctor and Liddell, who were both traitors and
spies for the former. Great! Just what I always wanted to be.
As for Doctor Ren’s memories – it turned out that other Banean
doctor planted altered memories onto my neural pathways.

Harry told me that he would never do what I did. Fool around
with the wrong woman. But he will. One day. And I told him
so. Okay, maybe Harry’s comments did irk me a bit. But I was
serious when I told him that one day, he could meet the wrong
woman. It happens to a lot of guys. Including straight
arrows like Harry.

I found Lieutenant Tuvok in the Mess Hall and thanked him for
clearing me of murder. In his usual Vulcan fashion, he claimed
that he would have otherwise if I had been guilty. But I
thanked him, anyway. Perhaps for being himself, for once.
Others would have naturally assumed the worst and not bother to
investigate the matter. Tuvok had approached the case in his
usual objective manner, thank goodness. As for the rest of the
crew – well, they had all assumed I was guilty, until Tuvok
proved otherwise. With the exception of the Captain, Harry,
the Doctor and Kes. Thank goodness for friends. And the
Doctor. End personal log.

STARDATE 48635.01 – Will miracles cease to exist? I don’t
think so. Especially after I was approached by one of the
Delaney sisters for a favor. It seems that Jenny has developed
an interest in a certain Operations chief and would like me to
arrange a date. Knowing Harry’s devotion to a certain
fiancée, 70,000 light years away, I realize it would be
difficult to arrange this date. I’ve already tried it once and
it didn’t work. Maybe I can try bribery. Or blackmail. Hmmm,
then again, Ensign Eager isn’t the type to succumb to bribery.
And he hasn’t done anything worth blackmailing over. Oh
well. Perhaps I’ll just pester him to death. End personal log.

STARDATE 48638.27 – What do you know? Pestering him to death,
actually worked! In the end, I finally got that double date I
had wanted. Harry, Jenny, Megan and I had the date in
Holodeck One, enjoying the charms of Venice. Well, Megan and I
were able to enjoy Venice. I can’t say the same for Harry and
Jenny. They went for a ride in a gondola and in her enthusiasm
to seduce Harry, poor Jenny overexerted herself and both ended
up in the Grand Canal – heads first. If I didn’t feel sorry
for Harry, I would have laughed. (Pauses) Okay, I did
laugh. But only after Megan laughed first. Her laughter can
be very contagious. So full of life. As for Harry and Jenny –
I have a feeling they won’t be dating for quite a while. End
personal log.

STARDATE 48643.26 – The whole ship knows about the date with
Delaney sisters. Heck, even Torres and Seska were discussing
it, while the former oogled the ship’s Marble Model. I’m
referring to, of course, Ensign Murphy. Actually, there are
two Ensign Murphys. The other Murphy serves under Tuvok in
Security, while the Marble Model is in the Science Division. I
wonder what Torres sees in a man who resembles a Starfleet
recruitment poster, anyway?

At least I’m no longer on the Maquis’ shit list. Harry and I
actually managed to enjoy a conversation with Seska and Torres.
Our little camaraderie didn’t last very long. Chakotay
summoned the Senior officers to the Bridge. It seemed Voyager
came across a ship emitting a distress signal. The ship is
from a nearby planet called Sikaris. And its inhabitants have
invited the crew to spend a few days there, and partake in its
pleasures. Sounds interesting. End personal log.

STARDATE 48643.38 – Ah, Sikaris! I must say it was a beautiful
planet with riches and food, galore for enjoyment. Many of the
women seemed very attractive. Unfortunately, my enjoyment of
the planet was nearly spoiled by my best friend.
After befriending a Sikarian woman named Endana, Harry
discovered that the Sikarians possessed some kind of trajector
that permitted folded-space transport. This trajector could
shorten Voyager’s return to the Alpha Quadrant by 40,000 light
years.

I could only imagine Janeway’s reaction when she heard the
news. Excited. Relieved. To be honest, I didn’t feel the
same. The further Voyager remained from Earth, the better for
me. Thanks to Harry’s discovery of the trajector, the Alpha
Quadrant had loomed pretty close. Too close. Thankfully, the
Sikarians had a canon of laws similar to the Federation’s Prime
Directive. Their laws prevented them from introducing their
technology to other cultures. You know, I usually have a dim
view of the Prime Directive. I mean, what is the point of
non-interference in an alien culture, when Starfleet is suppose
to be about exploration? You can’t explore unknown worlds
without some kind of interference or influence – however
unintentional. The Captain plans to approach the Sikarian
government about making Voyager an exception to their rule. I
hate to say this, but I hope she fails. End personal log.

STARDATE 48648.68 – What a goddamn mess! Who would have
thought a visit to a pleasure-seeking planet would end with
Voyager nearly being destroyed by a warp core breach? And its
Security Chief and Chief Engineer ending in deep shit with the
Captain? Frankly, I’m just glad I’m not the one who messed
up.

The Sikarian Council had rejected Janeway’s request for Voyager
to use their trajector technology. Thank goodness! She had no
choice but to abide by their decision. But it didn’t end
there. Harry’s friend, Endana, introduced him to a Sikarian
man named Jaret Otel, who was willing to break his world’s law
by trading the trajector technology for a library of Federation
literature. Harry, Seska, Torres and I discussed it. I more
or less told the others that they were wasting their time. The
Captain might consider Otel’s offer, but in the end, she would
never go against Federation principles.

Of course, I was right. But Janeway’s decision did not stop
Tuvok and Torres from making the exchange with Otel. And when
Voyager finally left orbit, the trajector proved to be
incompatible with Federation technology and nearly caused a
warp core breach. I learned from Harry that Seska and Joe
Carey were also involved in this scheme, but only Tuvok and
Torres got chewed out. If she had done worse, Voyager would
have ended up with Rollins or Pete Durst as Security Chief.
And Sue Nicoletti as Chief Engineer. I’m just glad that damn
trajector never worked. End personal log.

STARDATE 48662.6 – Will the Universe ever cease to amaze me?
It certainly didn’t, today. Who would have thought? Seska, a
Cardassian! Not only was she a Cardassian, but an agent of the
Obsidian Order, assigned to infiltrate the Maquis! What can I
say? I’m shocked. (Pauses) Then again, knowing Seska’s
character, perhaps not.

Thanks to encounter with a damaged Kazon-Nistrim ship, we
learned that someone aboard Voyager had been trading Federation
technology to the Kazon in exchange for their protection.
Suspects came down to two people – Seska and Joe Carey. Not
surprisingly, most of the ‘Fleeters suspected Seska and the
Maquis, Carey. My choice was Seska. When I told Harry, both
Torres and Ayala overheard me. “Starfleet to the end, right
Paris?” Torres had said with her usual sneer.

I had told her that my Starfleet background had nothing to do
with my opinion. “I don’t know Carey that well,” I said, “but
I know Seska. I don’t trust her within an inch of my life.
She has the brains and imagination to pull something like
this. And you all know how she feels about Federation
principles.” To everyone’s surprise, Ayala agreed. It seemed
he never really trusted Seska, either.

After Seska’s escape to another Kazon ship, most of the Maquis
walked around, either in a daze or looking humiliated.
Especially Chakotay. He was, after all, Seska’s loudest
defender and former lover. Poor Chakotay. He was always a
lousy judge of character. End personal log.

END OF PART I